Want Better Wellbeing? Become A Loser...
Want to win with wellbeing? Become a loser first…
Nowadays it’s common to hear “It’s not about winning, it’s the taking part that counts!” and fair play! There’s a great message in there.
In many situations, it is mentally healthier for our children to focus on their effort (something they can control) rather than the outcome.
But I’d even go a step further when we’re talking about our wellbeing as teachers…
You don’t need to ‘win’ with wellbeing. In fact, it often pays to just simply not ‘lose’.
When I say win, I’m talking about getting the gold in wellbeing terms: a perfect diet, superb sleep hygiene, 30 minutes of exercise every day, stretching, meditation, journaling…
You know, like Healthy Helen down the road who’s always out for a run at 5am!
Focusing on winning with wellbeing in this way is often paralysing, especially for us educators!
There are already so many plates to spin, so many tabs open in our minds that adding another 10 in the name of health likely isn’t going to end well for us.
Plus, it can taint our relationship with things like eating well and moving more.
We often experience perfectionism (which sometimes works for a week or two) but then are faced with the fearful ‘paralysis by analysis’ as we can’t achieve our gold standard of healthy habits.
Instead, we’d be better off by focusing on simply not ‘losing’ - especially when we’re at the end of the academic year as we are now.
Simon Ramo talks about this a lot in his book Extraordinary Tennis For The Ordinary Player.
He suggests that for the amateur player, the game is more about minimising your mistakes and waiting for your opponent to make them, rather than landing any outstanding, game-changing shots.
So for us as teachers looking after our wellbeing, it’s often about playing defensive rather than offensive.
(If I was more of a football fan I’d tie this in with England’s Euro efforts, but I haven’t got a clue about any of that… My other half is the football fan in our household!)
So what does ‘not losing’ look like in practise?
Well imagine for a second you’re Gareth Southgate.
(Oh no, here I go…) and you’re losing 1-0 at half-time.
I’m pretty sure that’s happened at some point in this tournament!
Would you start by taking off all your defensive players?
Of course you wouldn’t! The first thing you’d do is ensure you don’t concede any further goals.
That’s a little bit like what we’re trying to do here with the 5Fs.
Anyway, back to talking about a topic I know about…
First of all, it’s a much lower pressure practise. You’re not looking to set PBs for number of fruits eaten or fastest 5k run!
You’re simply focusing on minimising mistakes with the absolute basics, or as I call them, The Five Foundations.
These 5Fs are the building blocks of positive mental and physical health, and they can each be reduced down even further to a ‘minimal effective dose’ - the smallest version of that behaviour that still gives you a positive effect.
I am the Bitesize Behaviour guy, so let’s look at some really practical, realistic ways to incorporate these defensive habits into your day…
(It might help to choose 1-3 and start there!)
Sleep:
Turn your screens off 15 minutes earlier
Read, listen or write in bed instead
Quit caffeine after 3pm
Water:
Have a large glass when you wake up
Drink a glass with each main meal
Keep a water bottle on your desk
Fruits & Veggies:
Add some berries to breakfast
Blend some fruit into a smoothie
Add some salad to your lunch
Movement:
Take a 10 minute walk at lunchtime
Do the Daily Mile with the children
Move around when on duty
Time For You:
Put your phone away when watching TV
Listen to your favourite song on your commute
Think of one thing that went well as you brush your teeth
As you can see, our defensive players aren’t the most flashy, they don’t have the excitement and attraction of say a 7-day diet or a sweaty workout programme…
But they’re the bitesize basics, and it’s the basics done consistently that have the greatest impact!
Start small & stack the bricks.
Your wellbeing will thank you!
